Target Practice
by creativeone298
Summary: When Hardcase, Jesse, Dogma, and Kix have a bad day at target at practice, Hardcase suggests something interesting to spike their motivation.


Bang. Another shot strays from where it was supposed to go.

"Dammit Kix, that was your fourth miss in a row! We're really off tonight." Jesse groaned and rubbed his temples.

"Doesn't look like you're doing much better, Jesse." Kix retorted, turning sharply on his heel.

"Stop complaining, and blast away already." Dogma grumbled. He shot, and his laser grazed the edge of the target.

After Hardcase emptied a few of his own lasers and missed, he put down his gun and looked at the men standing by him.

"I've got an idea." He said.

"That's never a good thing." Dogma replied.

"Hear me out. We need some motivation to shoot well, right?" the other clones nodded, "Well, I propose we have strip target practice."

"That's not a licensed training exercise."

"Of course it isn't, Dogma; Hardcase came up with it." Jesse rolled his eyes. "Anyway, strip? As in 'take off our armor' strip?"

"One and the same."

"I hate to break it to you, Hardcase, but we see each other naked in the shower all the time." Kix said.

"We do, but do we ever really look at each other? I know that I don't stare at all you guys in the shower, but if anyone wants to come out now, I'm all ears." Jesse mused.

"Rules are simple. You miss the target; one piece of your clothing comes off. Winner is the one with the most clothes at the end of the game." Hardcase grinned. "I'll start." He aimed his gun at the target and fired. He missed narrowly. He made a show of taking his belt off and throwing it to the floor.

"Like that." He said, as if he meant to do it.

"I don't know about you, but I'm keeping my clothes on." Dogma said.

"Only one way to find that out." Jesse smiled; any embarrassment of Dogma was fun for the whole family.

"Fine, but only to prove that I have the best aim of all of you." He fired, and sure enough, he hit close to the center. Jesse then stepped up, fired, and barely made it onto the target.

"Come on Kix, let's see if you'll give Hardcase some company." Jesse joked, nudging Kix in the arm. Kix aimed, fired, and missed by a mile.

"You jinxed it." Kix said indignantly, also removing his belt. Hardcase went again, fired, and hit the target that time. They took turns firing, and laughing as everyone removed various components of their armor. Eventually, Dogma missed.

"It's about time." Jesse said, standing with only his chest and calves, and crotch covered by his armor. "Take something off."

"No; this game is stupid."

"Come on Dogma, be a good sport." Kix coaxed.

"Seriously, are you really going to stand here fully clothed while the rest of us look like we came directly from our jobs at a strip club?" Hardcase laughed.

"Yes." Dogma wasn't going to budge. The rest of the clones stared at him intently, making Dogma very uncomfortable. Jesse took a step toward him, and Dogma put his hands up.

"Fine. It's just my belt anyway." The rest of his comrades cheered, and Hardcase positioned his gun toward the target again. He was the worst off of all the clones, only having one shoe on, and then his underlayers. He missed, and looked at his friends.

"Hope you're ready for a show."

"Yeah, when you lose." Jesse said, firing and hitting the target dead on.

"Don't count your blessings yet, Jesse." Hardcase punched Jesse playfully.

Approximately half an hour later, Hardcase was down to only his lower underlayer, Jesse only had one calf plate and his underlayers, Kix only had his underlayers on, and Dogma still had his chest and shoulder plates, along with everything that went underneath.

"Can we call a break? I want to see if I'm still able to see anything other than that target." Kix

"Agreed." Dogma said, sinking to the floor. His friends joined him, grinning.

"So, do we finally call Dogma as the winner and the best shot of the four of us?" Jesse asked.

"I'm not stopping until Hardcase is as naked as the girls in Jesse's magazines." Kix teased.

"Oooh, Jesse reads pornos…" Hardcase grinned.

"Like the rest of you don't?" Jesse's face flushed red.

"I don't; it's against protocol." Dogma said.

"Dogma, did you eat the training manual, or was that against protocol too?" Jesse asked, exasperated. Hardcase slapped his knee while laughing, which was coming out in short barks, and Dogma's cry of indignation filled the air.

Captain Rex was patrolling the halls while talking with Fives, one of his new friends, when both of them heard something that made them stop dead in their tracks. A slap, a few short shouts, and a long, loud cry.

"I didn't know Senator Amidala was on this ship." Rex chuckled.

"What?" Fives asked.

"Oh, Senator Amidala and General Skywalker are in love, and do a terrible job of hiding it."

"Exhibit A?" Fives asked, gesturing toward the noise.

"I would say yes, but now that I think of it, that's coming from the firing range." The two turned around slowly and saw a heap of armor on the ground. Fives looked at Rex and his smile broadened.

"Captain, I'd say that we go embarrass them."

"I say that we leave them to their own devices."

"I've been looking at the armor. That looks like three chest plates and four guns."

Rex let out a low whistle. "Kinky, but that's none of our business."

"Well, I'm going." Fives set out toward the door. Rex ran after him, deciding that if something like this was happening, he wasn't going to be out of the loop. Fives saw Rex running behind him, slyly grinned, and opened the door. He saw four troopers laughing hard, barely wearing any clothes.

"Captain, would you do the honors?" Fives asked, struggling to keep his voice low.

"I'd love to." Rex said quietly. He coughed. "Boys, what is this?" The four clones snapped their heads around, and they all looked at each other. He recognized them as Jesse, Kix, Hardcase, and another clone whose name he couldn't remember.

"Strip target practice." Hardcase said, standing up. "We shoot, and if we miss, we take a piece of clothing off."

"It's supposed to motivate us to shoot better, but for us, it's been a mission in embarrassing Dogma and getting Hardcase naked." Jesse filled in.

Rex stifled a laugh "I see. How's the target practice going?"

"We're actually getting more accurate, sir." Dogma said, "We've taken twenty shots each, and we've missed less and less as time progresses.

"I kind of want to see the loser, sir." Fives sat down. Rex joined him on the floor.

The clones took a longer time aiming for the mark, now that the Captain was watching. Before anyone missed, Hardcase's brow furrowed and then relaxed.

"Want to play, Captain?"

"Why would I want to do that?" Rex asked, glaring at Hardcase. Hardcase flinched, but stood his ground.

"Try your skills?"

"Nice try. I'll shoot twenty a row in the end, and this armor is staying on."

"Is that a bet, Captain?" Hardcase ventured.

"No. It's showing that I'm a better shot than everyone here."

Fives rolled his eyes, hoping Rex didn't see him. "Let's see what you're made of."

Painstakingly slowly, all of the clones playing the game shot and hit the target. The game was intense, especially for Kix and Hardcase. Jesse's laser missed the wall after three slow rounds. The men all snickered as he begrudgingly removed his calf plate and threw it into the pile.

"This is taking forever. At this rate, the war will be over before this game is. You only have five seconds to take your shots now. Continue, men." Rex said, sitting back. Apart from a few groans, the protest was minimal. Kix slung his gun over his shoulder, fired sloppily, and lost his undershirt.

As the rest of the round went on, Fives nudged Rex:

"Who do you think will lose?" Fives whispered.

"My money's on Hardcase. The heavy gunners tend to not have the best aim." Rex replied. Hardcase's bullet hit dead center, seemingly taunting Rex's sterotypes.

Dogma then aimed his gun, looked up, and prepared to fire, but then, a clap came from the other end of the room, causing his laser to fly astray. Dogma glared at the source, and found Jesse quietly snickering to himself. He removed his left shoulder plate, and tossed it to the ground.

"We're playing dirty now?" He asked, his face flushing.

"Well, Hardcase never gave any rules beyond 'you miss, you strip,' so it's not dirty, exactly." Jesse said with a wry smile on his face.

As Jesse aimed, Kix tapped him on the shoulder, and he nearly missed.

"You were just asking for that one." He said pointedly. After that, it was a full-out distraction war, much to the entertainment of Rex and Fives. Jesse got good at ignoring the distractions after Kix had gotten him. Hardcase had many near misses, but they all seemed to be within the boundaries. Dogma even got his revenge by tapping Hardcase on the back of his head. Eventually, it was a question of which of the four clones, all without armor at this point, would lose. Kix aimed, fired, and made it. Hardcase wasn't so lucky. With the mirthful laughter of the clones around him, he sighed and stripped off his last underlayer.

"Like what you see?"

"I could get the same effect by looking in a mirror." Jesse said.

"Now, Captain. I think that you should have a go at this. Twenty seven shots. I'll do it too." Fives said.

"Twenty. It's what I agreed to before. Besides, nothing's coming off." Rex said, and stepped up. Bang. Bang. Bang, and so forth it continued. Each pistol fired off ten shots, and only one missed, which no one pointed out. Rex winced, and then shrugged.

"Still better than any of you." He said, taking off his shoulder pauldron.

Fives then stepped up, hoisted his gun to chest level, and fired away, missing three times. He took off his pauldrons, and his shoes.

"Good game." Jesse said, starting to rummage through the armor and mesh to find his.

"Can I put my clothes back on now?" Hardcase asked.

"I'd prefer it." Rex replied, looking away and readjusting his shoulder pauldron.

"This is just great. I'm just glad I engraved my name on the inside of my armor." Kix said, feeling around.

"In case you're in an entanglement with another clone and you need to identify yours quickly?" Jesse joked.

"No; in case shit like this happens." Kix replied, putting his chest plate on.

"I still can't believe I did this with all of you." Dogma mumbled as he adjusted his armor.

"You guys were really funny to watch." Fives said.

After everyone put their armor on, the clones looked at each other, not knowing a good way to bid each other adieu after this strange encounter.

"We never speak of this again?" Dogma posed this as a question, but it was more of a command.

The rest of the men looked at each other and nodded. "Agreed."


End file.
